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Showing posts with label Humanity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humanity. Show all posts

Monday, 28 January 2019

January 28, 2019

Life story: BN Book Excerpt: Adenike – Her Story, Your Movie, His Glory


BN Book Excerpt: Adenike – Her Story, Your Movie, His Glory 


BellaNaija has partnered with Adenike Oyetunde to give out four copies of Adenike – Her Story, Your Movie, His Glory. {Click here to read the announcement} Read the first of four excerpt from the book.

While carrying the last bucket from my bathroom to the storage room, I slipped in front of the bathroom and landed on my right knee. It was painful, so painful that my screams prompted my dad and his guest to rush to my aid.

 They helped me up, though it was so difficult standing; my father gave me a pain reliever. Still in pain, I had to leave for school—after all, it was just a fall, or so we all thought. As it were, I had no bruises, no fractured bone(s), and/or swelling.

 I tried ignoring the pain because prior to the fall, I was already having pains in that leg. A nurse had once mentioned the likelihood of arthritis. As was the norm, I called my parents when I got to school to inform them that I had arrived safely. 

I do not remember what happened between Monday and Thursday that week, not even the pain in my leg.

All I remember starts from Thursday morning. Our apartment—made up of a room, kitchen, and a toilet—was occupied by me, Abidemi and Sister Dayo. I’m not sure our last roommate Ebun Idowu was with us at this point. 

As there was no bed frame, the mattress had been placed on the floor. We liked it that way, anyway. That Thursday, I had a lecture for noon, but I was unable to get out of bed. When I told Abidemi that I could not stand, she thought I was joking. Everyone laughed, me inclusive. 

At that point, I didn’t count it as anything serious. At 8 a.m., I made the second attempt to get out of bed but failed. The third attempt at 9 a.m. also failed. 

Around 10 a.m., it became obvious that something was wrong, because by this time, I would have started to prepare for my lecture, made a meal, or at least taken a shower or done my makeup; but I was still on the bed.

It was then that Abidemi realized that I might be telling the truth about my inability to get out of bed. Tayo Akindele, another friend of mine who had a car planned to pick me on his way to school. 

I think Sister Dayo called to tell him that she needed him to come pick me, as no one knew why I could not get out of bed. 

We were not sure whether to go to the nearest hospital or Lagos. When Tayo arrived at my hostel, he carried me to his car and drove to Lagos.




There was no one at home when we arrived. As my parents were unaware that I was coming home and I didn’t have spare keys to the house, I had to stay at Joke Ojo’s house. From there, I phoned my parents to inform them of where I was and what had happened.

By this time, I had lost all the hair on my head and had gone shopping at Bodija market for sandals, shoes, clothes, wigs and a couple of other essentials. My father was perplexed about why I was so eager to leave, but he allowed me to do as I wished. 

From the hospital, he drove me to school after the fourth course of chemotherapy. During the drive, I gritted my teeth, tried hard not to give in to the nausea coursing through me. 

Ignoring it was hard; nausea was nothing like my blackened skin and skinny frame which I had chosen to overlook. My dad must have noticed my discomfort because he repeatedly asked if I was sure I wanted to return to school. Every single time, my response was “yes.” 

He soon stopped asking. The choice to stay tough came after I realized that I had no option but to fight for my life. My parents had done their best; the ball was in my court. Beside my personal disposition to being positive, I was thankful that I had since learnt the power of positivity. 

Once I got it into my head that I wasn’t going to die, I grew cocksure that my death wouldn’t come at the hands of cancer. After a long time spent running from pillar to post, I was ready to live. I wasn’t concerned about what would happen tomorrow. All I was concerned about was NOW. 

I wanted to live for NOW. I wanted to breathe and live pain-free, I wanted my peace; I wanted to enjoy life. I had begun to suspect that it was a different world out there for amputees, but I never anticipated what it was.

 At that point, I was not concerned about getting a prosthetic limb; that was possibly the least of my worries. I wasn’t concerned about what anyone said or what they would say.

 I wasn’t concerned about people staring at me. I wasn’t concerned about how much I had changed. I wasn’t concerned about who said what, because people will never stop talking. 

All I was concerned about was going back to school and writing the semester examinations. Living my life to the fullest had to be a decision, and I was intentional in my resolve to do so. 

I was ready to face my future, one day at a time. Not even chemotherapy would hold me down.
January 28, 2019

Is There Any Hope For The Nigeria Female Child? - Laura Nnamdi

Laura Nnamdi: Is There Any Hope For The Nigerian Girl Child?



When my friends and I joke around and I decide to tease, I say things like, “Your mates in the north are grandmothers already.”

My friend said they are not above the age of 23. It seems like a joke, something to laugh at, but stop for a minute and think: if a 23-year-old could be a grandmother, how old was she when she had her kids?

 It might seem a bit of an exaggeration, but please, get the message: a lot of underage girls are being forced into early marriages, especially in the Northern part of Nigeria.

It is what we hear. It hasn’t happened to any of our sisters or friends or relatives probably because they have parents who are exposed and educated and generally because it is not societally accepted in the south, and so we read it on the news and end with the Nigerian mantra,

“Eyah! Nawa o! This Nigeria sef. Man don tire.” And then we might even go ahead to coin funny memes and make light the issue.

The reason for child marriages in the North has been attributed to a number of factors: poverty, inexposure, ignorance and so on.

 The parents have no idea they are doing their daughters more harm than good; they feel it’s an age long custom their forefathers practiced and so it is all right.

They have no idea what the psychological, physical and biological effects of forced womanhood are.

Why don’t we shake some tables? The educated amongst them send their children overseas to gain mastery at whatever they want to and then refuse to educate the ignorant amongst them.

 Their sons are the center of attraction for the ladies while they send the ignorant ones to wear bombs and blow themselves up to tiny little pieces. Let’s see what our laws have to say about this issue.

Nigeria has a law that forbids early and premature marriages. The Child’s Right Act (CRA) Chapter IV of the 1999 Constitution has the very pleasant fundamental human rights that cover the children also.

 By virtue of Section 3 of the CRA, the provisions of Cap IV of the Constitution cater to the Nigerian child also as if expressly written in the CRA.

Nigeria has a plethora of laws, very good laws that are not being executed. The Child’s Right Act is one very important law that is being suffocated in Nigeria.

This is how it works: a federal law that is supposed to apply to the whole nation cannot be enforceable in a state when the subject matter it is addressing is on the residual list in our constitution, and except that state domesticates it.

Take the Children’s (Child’s) Rights Act 2003, for instance. It is a federal law (but children’s rights matters are exclusive to the state government) and as such, left to the mercy of states to either discretionarily domesticate it so it is applicable in such states or just ignore it.

The Act was adopted by Nigeria from the UN’s Convention on the rights of a Child. It spells out the actions prohibited as concerns a child and generally caters for the protection of the rights and responsibilities of a child. So far, only 24 States in Nigeria have domesticated this act, while a weighty number of northern states have refused to do so.

Obviously, it is against the irritating desires of their grown men. How can you set a trap before a rat and still give the rat the choice to enter the trap or walk away unharmed?

The repercussion of this is that a girl child can be married off in the states that have domesticated this law and the elderly parties involved will be arrested, while if the same thing happens in the states that have not accepted this law, people would clap and eat party rice and wish an 8-year-old girl a happy married life.

What time does she have to build castles with sand? Bathe in the rain? Play mummy and daddy? Braid her doll’s hair? Get quality education? What time does she have to be a child and enjoy childhood before being whisked away to face the harsh realities of life under the rolling belly of a father-like figure? What use is the influence of educated northern politicians and lawmakers? Especially the females.

This is the true meaning of feminism, not arguing about who should cook egusi soup in the house. The rich? What are we doing? Why then are we influential? The act has very lovely laws embedded in its sections, why deprive young children of the chance to be young? Any law that kicks against a child being young until it is pertinent or it is time that he or she grows up is barbaric!

By virtue of S.14 (1) of the act, no child is to be separated from his parents against his wish. But when a child is adorned with matrimonial attire and sent off to bear children, the very same thing the aforementioned section prohibits is openly done with a thousand and one nods of approval and nothing can be done.

 SS.21-23 of the act prohibits child betrothal, child marriage, and pins the lawful age for marriage at age 18 years and places a 5-year imprisonment or/with a ₦500,000 fine as punishment. Saddening that even with such laws, some people still openly perpetuate the disgusting act of child marriage and betrothing a baby girl to a baby boy or even worse, a baby girl to a man many years her elder.

For issues as important as this, I suggest the constitution be amended and have the prohibition against child marriage expressly written therein. The constitution is the grundnorm and every other law must bow before it.

By virtue of S.1, the constitution is supreme. Any law contrary to it is to be null and void. If our constitution expressly states that child marriage and its likes are prohibited, then states will have no option but to conform because the constitution doesn’t need the permission of a state’s legislature to be effective in such states.

Also, when laws such as the CRA passes the federal level, they should become automatically enforceable throughout the nation, or take out such very sensitive issues from the residual to the exclusive list. What is the use then if the very states that should have this law operative therein have refused to welcome it?

Easier said than done? Then why do we have the legislature? Are they there to haul chairs and dispense blows whenever there is a disagreement? Why are they there if they are not working? 

Nigerians have the power to repeal and recall. It is high time we sat up and had some “koinonia” with our rights as the electorate and imbibe the true spirit of democracy.

Give the girl child a chance to be a child. We can help by spreading the word, speaking up, proposing bills that would help, anything!

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